Here’s one…

What has 4 legs and could only lead the team to 0 net rushing yards on Saturday?

The Clemson backfield!!!  (Formerly known as “thunder and lightning.”)

In light of Alex Rodriguez’s boooo-tiful performance last night against the Red Sox (0-5, 2 double plays), we started thinking about the least clutch performers of all time. You know, your anti-Jordan or anti-Woods. If you were given the choice, you would probably take Craig Counsell at the plate with the game on the line over A-Rod.

In an effort to remind A-Rod that he has company (since he for sure reads this blog) and amuse ourselves, we bring the you the Top 10 Chokers in Sports… Read the rest of this entry »

If there was a line out there on what topic would so inspire to get back to posting, we assume Brett Favre would have beeen a Big Brown type favorite. And rightfully so. While browsing the sports pages today, we came to find out that even the AP has a love affair with ol’ Brett. We thought it was just ESPN, but apparently his heroism knows no bounds. Here’s the entirety of a short article from the AP (we have bolded and italicized out favortie part)…

HEMPSTEAD, N.Y. — Brett Favre said his rocket right arm feels “fatigued” — but not sore — during a break from his fifth day of practice with the New York Jets. Read the rest of this entry »

That’s the question we pose to on Robert Horry. They might still be proud of him, but it’s much tougher over the last two years than it was for the previous 36 years of his life.

Horry, who has dunked,*** was at it again with his “pick” from behind on David West, who has also dunked, last night. It’s rather difficult watching the Spurs these days. If they were in a movie, they would be the underhanded, cheap-shotting bad guy team that the good guy team had to overcome. The good guys here, of course, are the young Hornets.

But look at what has become of Horry’s career. He is a glorified Nehemiah Ingram. Who is Ingram? Other than a player who has dunked, Ingram is that “player” that Temple coach John Cheney sent in the game to foul against St. Joseph’s in 2005. Cheney, who we don’t think has dunked, was suspended for the season after his hard foul instructions led to a broken arm for a St. Joe’s player. Read the rest of this entry »

Have you happened upon the newest advertising angle for the WNBA? Well, it’s idiotic. The one we saw has former Tennessee stand-out Candace Parker uttering lines like: “Sorry, you couldn’t pay me to watch women’s basketball.” Then, at the end, they show a few clips that apparently refute all the derogatory comments. As in, those are things people say about the crappy WNBA… but they’re not true!

Um, yes they are. And it does not seem a very good idea to highlight your bad points. How would you feel if you walked into the dentist’s office to get your wisdom teeth removed, and the dentist starts with, “I’m sure you think I am a terrible dentist since I went to dentistry school in Guam, but you would be wrong!” Ah, that eases the concerns.

So, to make sure we had seen the commercial correctly, we searched for it on the internet. And we came across this article from the LA Times about the new ad campaign.

In that article, you can see the clip and look into the flawed reasoning for the commercials. But, this article contained one fantastic line that may change the way we run this site. The author wrote the following:

“Parker, who has dunked, said winning male fans is tough, but ‘once they see it, I feel like they’ll come back.’”

Who has dunked!!!

Imagine if every article about an athlete informed us of whether or not that athlete had dunked? How much longer would columns about the NBA run?

So, we’re going to attempt, over the next few weeks here on this blog, to let you know whether the subject of a post on here has or has not dunked.

We assume it may go something like this… Last night, Kobe Bryant, who has dunked, had a huge game for the Lakers. Or perhaps… This idiot writer Joe Santoro, who has not dunked, wrote one of his worst columns yet.

Maybe it will catch, maybe not. Maybe it will just barely graze the bottom of the net (a.k.a. as close to dunking as any writer on this blog can get).

Our inside source has just learned some not-so-shocking, breaking news from the NFL. The Steelers’ top draft pick, running back Rashard Mendenhall, has been suspended for at least the first 8 games of the upcoming season.

It appears the suspension was based on the incident described in this article in which Mendenhall was robbed at gunpoint early Monday in Chicago. Altercations involving NFL players and weapons will not be tolerated.

“I have no choice but to suspend Mr. Mendenhall,” Goodell reportedly told our source. “On Monday, the former Illinois running back took part in an incident where the was a weapon involved. Our policy is to suspend that player immediately, then possibly re-visit the situation after week 8. If Mr. Mendenhall can prove to me that he will no longer be robbed at gun point, then I will consider re-instating him.”

When our source asked about the fact that Mendenhall was not the one brandishing the weapon, he supposedly told our source that detail was “utter irregardlessness.”

When asked about another NFL player possibly involved in a weapons incident - Marvin Harrison - Goodell reportedly told our source: “Nah, Marvin won’t be suspended. Peyton vouched for him, and that’s good enough for me.”

Free Pacman!!!

We had some debate here at CIV. Do we take the time to point out all the mistakes made by The Nevada Appeal’s Joe Santoro or not? We’ve already done it once, so is it worth the effort to do it again? Of course it is!

Here’s our problem with Santoro… he clearly does not take the 2 minutes it would take to check his facts before writing his blurbs. He’s not like Mike Freeman, who just writes the cheapest, most ill-conceived stories to get a rise from people. Santoro just plain writes incorrect statements. And we can’t figure out why.

He does not make small errors, like missing a guy’s lifetime batting average by .003. It’s big things, like thinking Memphis University is in the state of Kentucky. Hence, we feel the need to once again call out Mr. Santoro for his obvious blunders.

As always, feel free to check here for the entirety of his Friday opinions. Read the rest of this entry »

Please note that today, May 1st, is a special day.  Why?

Because, from our research, today is the first day in the history of Todd Boyd’s contributions to ESPN’s Page 2 that he wrote an article that did not play the race card.  Really, it’s true.

We were as amazed as everyone else probably was.  We did not know he had it in him.  We were under the impression that Boyd was fully incapable of writing an article just about sports, or people, without making it a racial issue.

But somehow, today he had an article posted where he just discussed that he thinks the NBA MVP should be chosen after the playoffs.  It was an unbelievably rational article, especially coming from Boyd.

So, congrats to you, Boyd.  Not only is this the first time you have ever written an article where you do not inexplicably bring race to the forefront; it’s also the first article of yours we have decided not to bash.