In light of Alex Rodriguez’s boooo-tiful performance last night against the Red Sox (0-5, 2 double plays), we started thinking about the least clutch performers of all time. You know, your anti-Jordan or anti-Woods. If you were given the choice, you would probably take Craig Counsell at the plate with the game on the line over A-Rod.

In an effort to remind A-Rod that he has company (since he for sure reads this blog) and amuse ourselves, we bring the you the Top 10 Chokers in Sports…

(10) Marty Schottenheimer - Norv Turner is the man to think for cementing Marty’s spot on this list. No one thinks Turner is an even decent coach, yet he got the Chargers to the AFC Championship - a feat Marty never came close to. There is no coach in the NFL that will go down in history being as good in the regular season and as equally bad in the post-season as ol’ Marty.

(9) Gerry Thomas and Dan Mowrey - These two can collectively be known as “wide right.” In 1991, Thomas missed a field goal wide right for Florida State that would have won the game versus Miami with just seconds remaining. One year later, Mowrey equaled the feat by missing another wide right that would have tied the game against Miami. Both missed kicks cost FSU a chance to play for the title in the end, and both allowed Miami to take a run in the title game.

(8) Del Ballard, Jr - Our only appearance from the Professional Bowling Association. All Del had to do to win the tournament was not throw a gutter ball. Guess what he did? Click here for the agonizing clip.

(7) Karl Malone - Essentially, Karl Malone is the Marty Schottenheimer of the NBA. When you think about it, his “mailman” nickname works out perfectly. He’ll always deliver on time that LL Bean catalog you don’t really care about or the junk mail from Publisher’s Clearing House. But when you need that birthday check from your grandmother or tax refund envelope, it seemingly shows up 3 weeks late. In the 1998 NBA Finals with his Jazz up by one, Malone had the ball in the post with a chance to put his team up 3 and likely force a game 7. Instead, MJ stole the ball from him, then proceeded to hit his signature jumper over Bryon Russel for the win.

(6) Mighty Casey - We assume that Casey put up excellent numbers throughout the season for the Mudville Nine, else the fans would not have been hoping he could make it to the plate with a chance to win the game. But after the lesser hitters found their way on base to make Casey the game-winning run, what does he do? He strikes out and sends all the fans home sad. And oh, he let the first two pitches go by for strikes so he could show off on the third.

(5) Greg Norman - Always the bridesmaid. Sure, Norman has won 2 majors in his day, but he has finished second an astounding 7 times in majors. And in many of those runner-up finishes, he had the lead heading into the final round. You know what Tiger does when he is either tied or leading after 3 rounds? He wins the tournament 100% of the time. Norman? He usually shoots in the mid-70s and and misses out on the trophy. Of course, there was that time at the Masters in 1996 when he held a 6-stroke lead heading into Sunday and then lost to Nick Faldo by 5 strokes.

(4) Chris Webber - Webber has led teams in both college and the NBA that consistently came up short of expectations. He could always get the Kings to the playoffs, but never to the NBA Finals. And of course, Webber is here because he was the single most important player in one of the bigger choke-jobs in sports - calling a timeout for Michigan in the 1993 NCAA Championship Game when his team was out of timeouts. Impressive stuff.

(3) Barry Bonds - In his regular season career, Bonds has hit 762 home runs, driven in 1,996 runs, and hit a career average of .298. However, Bonds entered the league in 1986 and did not win a post-season series until 2002. In the playoffs for 1990, 1991, and 1992, Bonds had a total of 1 home run, 3 rbis, and 13 strikeouts. His career post-season average is just .245. And perhaps most famously, Bonds was unable to throw out Sid Bream who scored from second base in game 7 of the 1992 League Championship Series. Sid Bream!

(2) Atlanta Braves and Buffalo Bills (tie) - While the Braves did win one title, you would be hard-pressed to find two teams who had such great regular season success and then felt such post-season disappointment. The Braves won 14 consecutive division titles, but 13 of those 14 seasons have ended with a loss in the post-season. The Bills, of course, are considered a dynasty in some 3rd world countries where all the “Bills - Super Bowl Champions” shirts have ended up as donations.

(1) Johnny Lawrence - Entering the All Valley Under 18 Karate Tournament, reigning champion Johnny — sporting his sleeveless black Cobra Kai gee –was the clear favorite to bring a second trophy back to the Hills. And he had no trouble in the early rounds, but with the title on the line, facing the twerp who had stolen his girlfriend and didn’t even know karate tournament rules that same morning, Johnny totally collapsed. Lawrence’s loss is only compounded by the fact that his fellow Cobra Kai member Bobby had taken out Daniel Larusso’s knee in the semi-finals, forcing Larusso to limp around the mat. Even A-Rod managed to get a hit against Curt Shilling and his bum ankle in the 2004 ALCS.