We would not be doing our jobs if we finally did not take a stand about an important issue - the decision by NBC to run a pilot for a new “Knight Rider” series was a good one.  It was a great decision, and one we will stand by no matter what they are saying negatively in this area.  We just don’t understand all the backlash against the idea.

And we’ll leave you this inspirational number from our man Busta Rhymes.  No words, but instead a video that can be found here. 

We have been greatly amused the past few weeks at all of those people out there who thought that USC should be slated to play in the BCS title game.  Where are you guys now?  We can’t hear you anymore.  In fact, we’re not sure you all of you out there were clamoring about with this Trojan team anyway.

They said that USC was banged up against Stanford; that the game was a fluke and not reflective of how good USC actually was.  Well what do you think now?

We were glad to see the final nail driven into the coffin that was the USC national championship hopes.  The team that everyone thought was entitled to be ranked in the top 10 no matter what they did on the field finally played their way out of contention.  And it couldn’t have made us happier.

We knew all along that USC was not deserving of its lofty ranking, or even a top-15 ranking.  Following the Trojans loss to Stanford, they struggled with a sorry Arizona team.  Then, after whipping a worthless Notre Dame team, everyone wanted to put them back in the title game.  People wanted them ranked ahead of undefeated teams like Arizona State and Kansas.  And ahead of other 1-loss teams like LSU and Oregon.

But where are all those people now?  Oregon made USC look like just another average Pac-10 team on Saturday.  And the Trojans were shown to nowhere near worthy of a shot at the BCS championship - even though you all thought they were a championship caliber team just one week ago.  Well, they’re not.

And yes, we’ve heard people out there who still think USC is the best team in the country.  Well we have news for you - they are not even the best team in the Pac-10 anymore.  No matter what you might think.  USC has two losses, both in conference, so there is no way they are the top team in that conference.

We think it’s most appropriate to finish up this piece with our own modification of the great lines uttered by Ice Cube: Freaking brothers everywhere like m.j./ USC lost, today was a good day.

After reading this story about the ongoing USC/Reggie Bush saga, we had only one thought…

If Phil Fulmer coached a rival team in the PAC-10, USC would already be on probation.

Wonder why?  Check here.

We would like to announce a special event we are throwing together here at Complain In Vain.  This week will be designated as “Write Like Todd Boyd Week.”  Boyd, an occasional guest columnist on ESPN’s Page 2, just so happens to be one of our least favorite sports journalists around.  You can check here for our previous comments about Boyd.

But what will this special week entail?  Well, for each of the next four days, we will post one column written in the same way that Boyd writes.  He has one major angle that he uses that we will focus on - “they.”  See, Boyd likes to set up the fictional “they” to have an opinion he disagrees with.  Once Boyd has decided what he wants “they” to think, then he argues against that and shows how offended he is that “they” could even have such views in the first place (even though he is the one who attributed those views to his fictional counterparts).

So, our plan is to find issues that we can make more controversial then they actually are, then argue against some mythical societal force that inexplicably believes the opposite of what we think

And Tuesday, we will start off with a topic close to Boyd’s heart - USC football.

Guess where we’re going to dinner tonight?  Yep… Olive Garden!  Finally, one of those awful Olive Garden commercials really hit home with us.  We were watching Game 4 of the World Series and a new Olive Garden commercial came on during one of the last commercial breaks.

The commercial showed a few families sitting at the table in the restaurant and a lady at the table was doing the voice-over.  She starts the commercials by saying, “We started a tradition where we get together for dinner with friends.”

When we heard that, we all stopped what we were doing immediately and looked at each other.  What a great freakin’ idea!  We were blown away.  Dinner?  With friends?  What the hell!  Why had we not thought of this before?

So we decided to start a similar tradition.  We like to eat.  And we like to hang out with friends.  We just can’t believe we had never thought of combining the two.  What a concept!

We hope the brains behind that Olive Garden commercial get a raise.  We can say with certainty that those ad writers are directly responsible for at least an extra $60 being spent at an Olive Garden tonight.

And now we would like to officially ask The Masters to step aside, there is a new tradition that’s unlike any other!

Before heading into the weekend, we must take note of some significant activities that have been going on around the world over the past week.  Namely, the fact that this has been an unprecedented week for stories about wild animals doing truly absurd things.  Seriously, folks, the following three stories could easily make up an hour-long show on FOX some Friday during the summer.

And did we say we feel certain having 3 of these stories in one week is without precedent?  Here they are…

(1) On Sunday, it was reported that a gang of Rhesus macaques in New Delhi attacked the deputy mayor, who then fell off his balcony to his death.  Check here for the full story.

(2) On Tuesday, it was reported that six wild elephants in Gauhati, India, were electrocuted after getting drunk from taking down large quantities of rice beer being brewed in the village.  Check here for that full story.

(3) And finally, on Thursday, it was reported that some wild monkeys in Kenya have been making lewd gestures towards women.  In fact, the women have now often begun dressing as men so as to avoid the harassment from the monkeys.  Check here if you don’t believe us.

This is truly an amazing run of ridiculous animal-related stories.  We feel certain that a run of stories like this will likely not occur for the next 50 years, at least.

So sit back, pour yourself a rice beer, and enjoy the reading.

In an effort to take a break from our sports commentary, we decided to go with old fall-back of compiling a list.  The list is our version of Vinny Testaverde, if you will.

Anyway, we present…

The Top 10 Most Quotable Movies

(10) Rain Man - Pretty much any line uttered by Dustin Hoffman in this movie will do, as long as you repeat it a few times.  There’s Wapner, Qantas, or just the basic, “I’m an excellent driver.”

(9) Monty Python and the Holy Grail - This would be higher on the list, except that you definitely need a counterpart also familiar with the film to really pull it off.  But on your own, there’s “I fart in your general direction” or “It’s only a flesh wound.”

(8) Tommy Boy - With this flick, you get two options.  You can go with Farley’s lines - “Fat guy in a little coat” or “That’s gonna leave a mark.”  Or try it out with Spade’s sarcasm - “Ah, M & M’s on in the dashbaord, that really ups the re-sell value.”

(7) Cool Hand Luke - Oddly enough, most of the great quotes come from characters other than Luke.  There’s the always solid, “What we’ve got here is, failure to communicate…”  But a really wide range of options come from: “If you [fill in the blank], you spend the night in the box.”   Not to mention being able to ask permission for all activities, beginning and ending the request with “Boss.”

(6) Full Metal Jacket - Memorize everything said by Sgt. Hartman in the first 45 minutes.  It’s just that easy, way too much to choose from.  A quick one that can work in any situation: “Sir what? Were you about to call me an asshole?”

(5) Old School - With a variety of main characters, this movie provides many options.  Some of our favorites include: “Denver, the Sunshine State, gorgeous” or “You’re my boy, Blue.”  And of course, any reference to Home Depot or Bed, Bath, and Beyond has the appropriate quote tailor-made.

(4) Pulp Fiction - While we would advise staying away from the over-used “going medieval” quote, there’s a lot to be used form this film.  Try out, “This is a tasty burger,” or “I’m Superfly TNT, the Guns of the Naverone.”  Then there’s the always subtle, “Zed’’s dead, baby, Zed’s dead.”

(3) Office Space - You have to be careful when quoting this movie.  But, if done correctly, you can really create some nice moments.  Any reference to a stapler or TPS reports should always go over well.  If you want to be more adventurous, you can suggest that someone might have a case of the Mondays.  And you have the perfect answer to the question, “What would you do with a million dollars?”

(2) The Big Lebowski - Where to begin?  This movie has plenty to work with.  You can try out “That rug really tied the room together” as a comment for just about any situation.  You are provided with about 10 different ways to refer to a White Russian cocktail.  Also, any piece of dialog from John Goodman’s character is golden.  “Donny, you’re out of your element.”

(1) A Few Good Men - We have neither the time nor the space on this blog to explain all the great quotes that can retrieved from this movie.  You need to watch it, then watch again, then maybe one more time.  Every line in this movie (other than the one involving the phrase “galactically stupid”) is a top of the line quote for almost any situation.  And it’s a bonus if you make good use of the terrific lines spouted off by characters other than Jessup.

Are we clear?